In Honor of My Dad

This year, 2010 has been a rough one for my dad.  Over these past several months, my dad has had some medical problems.  In and out of the hospital was almost a monthly occurrence.  It's been difficult to see him losing his eyesight, not being able to stand or walk more than a couple of steps.  It was especially difficult when I left to go to my Scentsy convention at the end of July.  I worried about him and his physical well-being.

When I returned from Denver, dad became less ambulatory, getting him into the car was a challenge.  On one of our many doctor visits my brother and I could not get him into the car.  This was the beginning of him slipping away from us.  Once we got him home with the help of medial transportation, we were not home more than 30 minutes when he began to complain about the severe pain he was in.  I called 911 and had him taken to the hospital.  He was in Banner Baywood hospital for a week before it was discovered that his problems were neurological and this required him needing a neurosurgeon.  Dad was transported to Banner Desert to have back surgery.

After the surgery his pain was more manageable, but he could not stand for more than 10 to 15 seconds.  As a result he could not come home and had to go into rehabilitation.  During his rehab he did not improve and we had to make other arrangements.  My sister, LaDonna, and I went to several facilities to find one that was acceptable to us and had the best care for dad.  It was a tough decision, however we did find the best and the staff amazing.

Dad moved into Emerald Groves October 16, 2010.  Even though he could not stand or even sit in a chair for any length of time...he was a happy man.  He really did not complain, and for that I am truly grateful!  One thing I did promise my dad, and that was that I would see him every day.  I did my best and I can honestly say that when I could not be there he understood.  I believe I only missed 7 visits in his 2 1/2 month stay at Emerald Groves.

The last week of his life is a sweet and dear memory for me.  As I write this, I hope those who read understand the love and care that was shared during these last few days.

• Monday, Dec 26th - Dad had not been eating well so I bought a Subway sub and he ate 1/4  of it.  We had a nice visit.  Dad was concerned about LaDonna and her family as they were traveling to France for a vacation.  There was a major blizzard on the east coast and dad was concerned for their safety.  To reassure him, I asked him if he would like to call LaDonna and he said yes.  I dialed the phone knowing that she may not answer due to her traveling, but it made dad feel good knowing he was calling to check on her.
• Tuesday, Dec 27th - Came to visit dad for lunch and I brought him a Jr Whopper.  I was amazed that he ate most of it.  We had a very nice visit...I said, "Dad, I love you!" and he said, "I love you more!"
• Wednesday, Dec 28th - Received a phone call from hospice and was told that dad was actively passing away.  I picked up Roger to go visit with dad.  He asked if his eyesight would get better and I sadly had to tell him no.  After a little bit I told him that I would see him tomorrow.   He said, "Tomorrow?"  I said, "Do you want me to come back later today?" "Yes", he said.  So Roger and I left for a bit, knowing that time was passing.  We went and had a lunch together.  I asked Roger if he would go with me to Bunkers Funeral Home to begin funeral arrangements.  After making the necessary arrangements, Roger and I returned to see dad.  
• Thursday, Dec 29th - Came to visit dad about 4pm.  I went to his ear, as I always did, and said, "Dad, I'm here. I love you!"  He said, "I love you more!"  I sat down in the chair next to him and after about 20 minutes he said, "I don't want to get on the train!"  I got up and went to his ear and said, "You don't want to get on the train?"  He said, "No".  I asked him, "Why?"  He said, "I don't want to."  Again I sat down letting him rest and about 5:30pm I went to his ear and said, "Dad I have to go now."  He said, "When can I go?" I said, "Dad, you can go any time you want to go!"
• Friday, Dec 30 - I received phone call from hospice about 15 minutes past midnight.  Dad was non responsive.  I immediately went to Emerald Groves.  I went to dad's ear and said, "Dad I'm here, I love you."  The CNA said, "Karen, he said I love you more."  I could not hear it, but she saw his mouth move.  I hugged and kissed him and told him it was ok to go and be with Great, his mother, his father and his brothers.  And with all the energy he had he said, "I don't want to!"  My father LOVED life.  He did not want to leave us and his friends. I stayed with dad all night and left at 10:30am.  I knew it was time.  I left and went to buy his burial clothes.  I went home, had lunch, and rested.  I returned about 4pm and I went to his ear and said, "Dad I'm here. I love you."  There was no response.  At about 4:50pm I went into dad's walk-in closet to call Roger.  I did not want any chatter in dad's room, because I know the last sense you lose is your hearing.  And even though he was hard of hearing, I didn't want any thing to disrupt the peacefulness of that room.  After about 15 minutes I existed the closet to find that my dad had passed away.  

My Dad: Kennon Laird

Born: January 23, 1935

Died: December 31, 2010

Dad, I love you more!